Book Review Vertigo and Ghost by Fiona Benson

Title:      Vertigo and Ghost

Publisher: Cape

Author:  Fiona Benson                                                         

First published:  2019

Genre:   Poetry 

Awards Shortlisted: T S Eliot Prize 2019

Content        The book has two halves. Part 1 contains poems about Zeus. He’s presented as a serial rapist. The poems cover the arc of his life. There are poems about the various rape encounters he’s had with a variety of goddesses. There are poems about his later imprisonment and execution. Although the poems depict classical Greek characters, Benson sets these encounters in a modern day setting.

                    The second half of the collection contain personal poems. These are poems depicting nature, specifically where she lives with husband and children in the west country. Two daughters. She writes about the experience of motherhood and the anxieties associated with bringing up young children. There is danger, threat, self-sacrificial and love.

Comment     Setting the first part of the collection in classical Greek mythology tmay be a way of creating distance between readers and the experiences she depicts. Descriptions are often violent and disturbing. Shocking.

                    The whole collection begins with a personal autobiographical poem about being a teenager. I think it’s brilliant. It prepares us for the second half of the collection. I really thought there were some great poems here.

Recommendation           4/5

Click here to buy this book from amazon

Poetry Reading at The cornerHouse Arts Centre Douglas Road Surbiton.

Poetry reading at the cornerHOUSE Arts Centre in Douglas Road Surbiton. 
Where: 116 Douglas Road  Surbiton
When: Friday 6 December 2019
Drinks: 7.00
Reading: from 8.00

Entry £4.00

Click here for more details.

Poetry Reading at The Troubadour Monday 2 December 2019 at 8.00

Monday 2 December marks the end of tthe autumn poetry season at The Troubadour in Earls Court. 

That means a poetry bash where invited poets read a poem on a specific theme. The theme is: Somewhere Over the Rainbow. They'll be at least forty poets reading.

There's also the opportunity of hearing the prize winners of the 2019 Troubadour Poetry Competition

Click here for further details about the poetry reading.

It starts at 8.00.

£8.00 entry.

Come along and be dazzeled by words

Book Review: The Heat of the Moment by Sabrina Cohen-Hatton

Title: The Heat of the Moment         

Publisher: Doubleday

   Author: Sabrina Cohen-Hatton
   First published: 2019
   Genre: Autobiography




Content

Cohen-Hatton writes about her life as a fire fighter and a Deputy Assistant Commissioner. She’s been in the fire service for over 20 years. In this book she describes with quite vivid detail what it’s like tackling major fire incidents. Cohen-Hatton also presents us with a high ranking managers perspective on the decision making processes involved in tacking such incidents. It’s a book partly showing us the mind of a manager and the multi-layered considerations required in managing such incidents. It’s also a book about psychology. She details the psychological processes people go through when faced with such traumatic experiences.

Comment

Dr Sabrina Cohen-Hatton is Jewish. Her father was Morrocan. He died of a brain tumor when she was 15.
The book describes a range of fire incidents. They are vivid and dramatic episodes.  Incredibly readable.
She tells us about the extra ordinary life journey she has been on to arrive at such a senior position in the fire service. She writes about her homelessness as a teenager and her award winning post doctorate research into decision making under acute circumstances. And how this research has changed the way fire fighting is tackled today. Notjust in the UK but globally. It’s incredibly readable and fascinating.

Recommendation   5/5



Click here for a recent Desert Island Discs featuring the author

The 2019 T S Eliot prize shortlist

I should have posted this some time ago when the shortlist was first published back in October. But never mind. Here it is now.

The 2019 TS Eliot prize shortlist

After the Formalities by Anthony Anaxagorou published by Penned in the Margins
Vertigo & Ghost by Fiona Benson published by Cape Poetry
Surge by Jay Bernard published by Chatto & Windus
The Mizzy by Paul Farley published by Picador
Deaf Republic by Ilya Kaminsky published by Faber & Faber
Arias by Sharon Olds published by Cape Poetry
The Million-Petalled Flower of Being Here by Vidyan Ravinthiran published by Bloodaxe
Erato by Deryn Rees-Jones published by Seren
A Portable Paradise by Roger Robinson published by Peepal Tree Press
The Caiplie Caves by Karen Solie published by Picador

Click here for an article reviewing and summarising the books

Thought for the Day Radio 4 15 October 2019 with Rev Dr Giles Fraser

I haven't been following Thought for the Day since I stopped comuting to work at 7.30 in the morning. But the other morning I was driving to an early hospital appointment when I heard Giles Frasier's episode. It struck a few chords with me including Jewish and Christian so I thought you might like to hear it.

Click here for a link

Desert Island Discs

I just have to share this current Desert Island Discs programme. I'm absolutely overwhelmed by the story of Sabrina Hatton-Cohen.

Click here for the link to the programme

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/m0008xy6

Feeling Dizzy by David Loffman

Here's one of the poems I read at the poetry reading at the cornerHouse last Friday. I hope you like it.

Feeling Dizzy

At first, it’s a flutter in my stomach.
I feel lightheaded
and a little dizzy.
With a dull ache in my chest.
It stays a while.

Then dissolves into the jobs 
and usual distractions of the day.

Weeks later it comes again.
More insistent now.

This time it comes with an ache 
high up in my throat.
Everything feels a bit fizzy.
I want to cry.

I take an Aspirin.

I tilt my head and listen
in case it has something to say to me.

Silence.
I think about calling a doctor.

It comes and goes like this for a few weeks.
I live uneasily with it.
A little worried.

I realise there’s something strangely familiar about it.
From long ago.

When it comes I stop and tilt my head
and ask it, what are you? 
and where are you from?
But it never answers me.

Sometimes I let myself get distracted.

I think about calling a doctor again.

Then one day when I’m in the middle of it
I count off the symptoms again.
And suddenly it clicks 
I know exactly what this is.


It's happiness.

Sermon 11 August 2019 at Christ Church New Malden

Click here to a sermon I gave at Christ Church New Malden on the 11 August. The sermon series is called, "A Christian who has changed my life." I chose to talk about Alan Caldwell, my father-in-law. Katy's dad.

Here's the reading used in the service.

Ephesians 3:14-21 

For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge – that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.


Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.


When you click here scroll down to the 6.30 service.
You'll find it under the date 11 August.

It's about 20 minutes long.

Click here to stream it or download it. 

Here's a transcript of the sermon in case you want to read along.


I hope you are enjoying these hymns we’ve been singing this evening. Some of the songs were sung at Alan Caldwell’s funeral. 

The Reverend Alan Caldwell, he was my wife’s dad, my father in law until he died in March – just 5 months ago. 

The first time I met Alan was in November 1982. Katy and me had been friends for a year or so. One weekend she invited me home to meet her family. They lived in a small village about 10 miles from Ipswich in deepest darkest Suffolk.
I remember the bus we took from the station. It was evening. Very quickly we travelled out of the street lights of Ipswich and plunged into countryside darkness. I peered out of the windows. I couldn’t make out anything at all. A few blurred lights maybe. The bus raced along until suddenly about 20 minutes into the journey Katy suddenly stood up and rung the bell. The bus drew rapidly to a stop.
When I got out I thought we were in the middle of nowhere. I thought I’d landed in a gothic horror story. And then I noticed a dimly lit porch light a little way off. Suddenly we were in the kitchen. They were all there. The Caldwell family with Alan popping in and out with Bibles and bits of paper under his arm.
What I most remember from that first meeting with Alan was the warm and totally accepting welcome I felt from all of them. Phew! This wasn’t a gothic horror story after all. This was Little Women or Pride and Prejudice.

When I look back at that bus journey on that evening to Katy’s family, I think that it was like my life up until that moment. There was nothing but darkness all around me. And then I came into that kitchen. A Christian home filled with light and warmth. I felt accepted and loved right from the start. 

One way Alan showed his love and acceptance of me was the way he treated my Jewishness. Being Jewish didn’t really mean much to me back then. I’d had a Bar Mitzvah and I knew the basics. But as I grew up – if I was honest - my Jewishness was a bit of a problem. Firstly we were quite a lonely family. My parents felt a strong sense of being Jewish but never went to the synagogue. And they never mixed with non-Jewish people. Secondly being Jewish in a north west London secondary modern school in the 1970’s wasn’t easy. I was an outsider. Word got around about the boy that didn’t go to morning assembly. The anti-Semitic insults soon followed. 

A few years before  I met Alan I did meet and made some Jewish friends. They’ve been an amazing support to me over the years even though I became a Christian. We are still all very close.

But despite those friends, Alan reminded me that the Jews were God’s chosen people. He said being Jewish was special. He told me that Jesus was a Jew. He began telling me about how the stories in the Old Testament were linked to the stories about Jesus in the Gospels. At first I didn’t pay much attention. But I remember he invited me to visit a bible exhibition showing what life was like in Palestine when Jesus was alive. 
Alan was the first person to show me how important it is to be Jewish. He helped me to value something about myself that I thought totally unimportant.
I think my ministry here at Christ Church has been informed partly by my Jewishness. And I feel comfortable and confident in my Jewish heritage. It was Alan and those Jewish friends who made that possible.

Another really important influence Alan has had on me was how he helped me to love the Bible. 
He was passionate about the Bible. He told me how central the Bible is to being in a relationship with God. Before I became a Christian I had loads of discussions with him about the Bible. He always made a point emphasising how the translators of the NIV went back to the original Greek and Hebrew texts. He told me how careful they were in translating the psalms and other Hebrew poems and songs. 
Over the years he’d shown me the importance of reading the Bible daily, of meeting people regularly to read and get to know the Bible better. He introduced me to the Amplified Bible and the Chain Reference Bible.

7 years after I first met Alan I began teaching. It was now 1987. I’d become a Christian 2 years earlier in 1985. Alan had baptised me. I attended his Confirmation classes. He prepared me for my Confirmation. Amazingly he gave Katy away at our wedding and then somehow married us both. 

So I began a career in teaching. I loved teaching but it was so intense. I remember I found that first long summer holiday difficult to cope with. So when the long summer holiday came work suddenly stopped. I didn’t know what to do with the silence and all that spare time.

Then in the second summer holiday I suddenly remembered the Bible. Every morning after Katy left for work I’d start reading and exploring it. At first I brought my knowledge and experience of studying English. And gradually over the years, I bought a concordance,  a chain reference bible, an Amplified Bible, a Bible dictionary and a Dictionary of Theology. And for about 2 or 3 hours each day I explored the holy scriptures. It was an incredible time. I felt the Holy Spirit was with me, guiding my reading. It was very exciting. In the summer holidays before we had our children I really felt I was getting to know the Bible. I found that the routine and discipline helped me structure the long summer days. From then on they became a pleasure and a delight. Alan had helped me discover that.

And it’s good to be reminded of that time again now with Iona and Arran grown up and left home. Especially now that I’ve just retired. 

It’s about time I really got stuck into the bible like I did in those summers.

So Alan really helped me read and love the bible. If we ever found ourselves talking about it we almost always disagreed. But he trusted in the Holy Spirit working in my life. Perhaps he had an idea that at some point in the future I might stand in front of a congregation like I am today.

I think he started preparing me for leading a home group or preaching really early on when I’d only been a Christian for a couple of years.

One summer soon after Katy and me got married Alan suggested a sailing holiday. Alan was a very experienced sailor. He’d got certificates and everything. So he was our captain. But we were a pretty motley crew. There was Katy and her sister Helen and me and my mother. A family holiday. I don’t think the crew had any serious sailing experience. Two of us couldn’t even swim. Alan took charge. We obeyed our orders and did our jobs. 
He also gave me a special job to do. I was to choose a Bible reading every evening and make then share a few reflections on it.

That holiday was important. Alan was bringing two very different families together. He was building bridges and establishing bonds. Even today Helen and my mum have a special friendship that goes back to that holiday. They still laugh over watching the Port Watch – Katy and me - starting work, while they – the Starboard Watch sitting back and getting out their knitting. 
We were pretty hopeless though. We got stranded on sand banks. We made loads of blunders. But it didn’t matter at all. Alan had brought us together. We were a community, a family. We were building memories. We were getting to know each other and sharing difficulties. He showed me – all of us - the importance of a community working together in unity with a common purpose. Like a church.

So these are three stories about Alan Caldwell that show some of the ways he influenced and shaped my Christian life. There’s loads more stories I could share about him. Like the fact that Katy and me settled here in New Malden. We’re here  because when Katy was moving to London in 1984 for work, she received one reply from her advert. It came from New Malden. But we stayed here because Alan was a curate here at Christ Church and became Curate in Charge at St John’s between 1969 and 1973 when Katy was a girl. It’s there Alan met Trevor and Sue Webster and introduced them to the church. You can read all about Alan’s time here in the Exhibition Stephen is putting up in the church halls.

So finally I just want to say a couple of things about Alan’s funeral and Bible reading we had.

Alan had a huge influence on my life. I hope I’ve shown that. But of course I’m aware that he also had a massive impact on thousands of people’s lives over the course of his life, and especially in his church ministry. 

When Alan’s daughters were planning the funeral at St Mary’s church in Menai Bridge Anglesey they really didn’t know how many people were going to turn up.
Menai Bridge is quite an isolated community. There it is on the north west tip of Wales.  Well the response was enormous. The church was packed. Extra chairs were brought in and people were standing at the back and in the aisles. 

At the reception afterwards they had to bring in more tables, chairs and provide a lot more tea things for people.

Past pupils came to the funeral. They were people Alan had taught 60 years ago. There were people from the two creative writing groups he had joined when he’d retired. There were people from the local Samaritans. Alan had been an active Samaritan in Menai Bridge right up to the time he was diagnosed with Pancreatic cancer last December. There were neighbours, old family friends and parishioners from the parishes he had ministered to over decades – including many of the churches on Anglesey. As well as the parish church he’d worshipped at in Menai Bridge.

It was extraordinary to be a part of that funeral service and to meet so many of the people his life had touched, changed and transformed.

The reading chosen at Alan’s funeral came from Ephesians, chapter 3. 
Iona – my daughter – Alan’s grand daughter read it at the funeral.

Alan’s daughters chose Ephesians because this was Alan’s favourite book of the Bible. When Alan was training to be a minister at Oakhill College in 1965, alongside Stephen’s dad, Gordon Kuhrt and John Short,  Alan joined an early morning Bible study. They studied Ephesians. Alan got to know the letter really well.


And this is just an incredible passage to read. It’s a prayer in which Paul hopes that God will bless his readers by bestowing on them the ability – that is the discipline and will power - to enable faith in Jesus to live and flourish in his readers lives. And to know the vastness of God’s love for each of them.
As Alan studied this passage he must have felt Paul writing to him directly. And as Alan read this passage year in year out throughout his ministry he must have prayed it for us - his family including me and all the people and parishioners he knew and ministered to over many years.

It’s a prayer he would pray for all of us.

When I think about Alan now just 5 months after his death, I think I’ve been blessed by having 3 father’s in my life. There’s my biological dad – Martin - who brought me up. There’s also Michael Denman – he’s the consultant immunologist who treated me, saved my life back in 1976 and lead me back into education. And then finally Alan Caldwell. I never was able to call Alan dad or father but I owe much of my Christian life to him. He baptised me. He brought me to confirmation. He even gave Katy away at our wedding and then married us. 

Alan had a huge impact on my life.
I thank God for him. 

I miss him. 

Poetry Reading 7 June The cornerHouse Surbiton

So yet again I'm one of several poets reading in the evening. 

There's always a warm and welcoming atmosphere on these poetry evenings.

So come and join us.

Enjoy

Poetry reading, Friday 26 April

I'm one of several poets reading in the evening. There's always a supportive and sympathetic audience. 

Come and join us on 26 April.

In print

Oh my goodness I'm in print! Along with other poets! An anthology! And for sale on Amazon! Terrifying! I'm sorry! And I'm on the cover!

Here's a link

Poetry Reading - The Troubadour 265 Old Brompton Road, Earls Court. 10 December 8.00

I'm going to be one of about 50 poets invited to read at The Troubadour in Earls Court, London on the 10 December. The reading starts at 8.00. The theme is 'snow'. Entry is £7.00 I think. It'll be a great evening of poetry. Come along and join the party.

Click here for details

Poetry reading Friday 12 November The cornerHouse 116 Douglas Road Surbiton 8.00

I'm one of several poets reading at the cornerHouse Arts Centre in Surbiton

116 Douglas Road, Surbiton, KT6 7SB

on Friday 16 November

The bar is open from 7.00

The reading begins at 8.00

Tickets are £4.00

The themes for the evening are horses, holiday and blue

If you've got poems on any of these themes, then come, sign up and read.


Click here for a link to the event

It will be an informal, friendly and poetry filled evening.

Come and join us

Poetry Reading - The Voyage Out. The Troubadour. 263 - 267 Old Brompton Road. Earls Court. SW9 5JA

Hello there. So I'm one of 21 poets invited to read a commissioned poem in the first half of the poetry evening; The Voyage Out. In the second half of the evening, Anne-Marie Fyfe will be reading from her collection The Voyage Out. It starts at 8.00. £7.00 entry.

In The Voyage Out Anne-Marie "presents her sequence on writers and the sea, with selections from favourite novelists, travel-writers & poets, from the constant, recurring presence of the sea in her first five collections of poetry, & from her new writing project combining poetry & prose memories, of growing up, of life by the sea in Cushendall, and of other coastal locations she’s experienced on her travels."

A Responsibility to Awe

I came across this video some time ago. I might have shared it then.

The beginning of a summer holiday seems a good time to share it now.

Enjoy.

Listen by David Loffman at The Troubadour June 2018

Here's a photograph of us all upstairs at The Troubadour restaurant before we descend into the dark humid cellar for a dazzling night of poetry.

   

Here's a photograph of me during the actual performance.

Below is a video of the poem I read. 

Poetry Reading at The Troubadour Monday 25 June

I've been invited to read a poem at the end of season Troubadour summer party. It's going to be hot. It's going to be full of wine and poetry and music and prizes as well as a warm and inviting atmosphere. 

This year's theme is sound and silence.

Come and join us.

Beyond the Border

It's been almost a week since we returned from the Beyond the Border festival in South Wales. And I've still not quite recovered.

It was a fantastic weekend.

We've been coming to the festival since Iona and Arran were 4 years old. They're now 23. Iona bought her boyfriend and some friends to help her celebrate her birthday. I think we celebrated it in style.

Below is a video giving a flavour of the festival. 

Two performances that will really stick with me were Hugh Lupton and Daniel Morden's Odyssey on Saturday evening. On Sunday was Beyond the Border's 25th birthday celebration. There was music, poetry and story. 
David Ambrose performed Dylan Thomas's, Poem in October to end the evening. Absolutely spellbinding.

I feel so much of my life is lived in straight lines. There isn't a straight line at Beyond the Border. It's good to remember that there are other ways to live.

Rain on the sun

This looks incredible. Thought you might like it. 

Click here to the Astronomy Picture of the Day post.

https://apod.nasa.gov/apod/ap180527.html

Video Credit: Solar Dynamics Observatory, SVS, GSFC, NASA; Music: Thunderbolt by Lars Leonhard

Explanation: Does it rain on the Sun? Yes, although what falls is not water but extremely hot plasma. An example occurred in mid-July 2012 after an eruption on the Sun that produced both a Coronal Mass Ejection and a moderate solar flare. What was more unusual, however, was what happened next. Plasma in the nearby solar corona was imaged cooling and falling back, a phenomenon known as coronal rain. Because they are electrically charged, electrons, protons, and ions in the rain were gracefully channeled along existing magnetic loops near the Sun's surface, making the scene appear as a surreal three-dimensional sourceless waterfall. The resulting surprisingly-serene spectacle is shown in ultraviolet light and highlights matter glowing at a temperature of about 50,000 Kelvin. Each second in the featured time lapse video takes about 6 minutes in real time, so that the entire coronal rain sequence lasted about 10 hours. Recent observations have confirmed that that coronal rain can also occur in smaller loops for as long as 30 hours.

Poetry Reading, The Lighthouse, Deal, Kent on Thursday 26 April

Here's a couple of photographs taken at the Soundlines Poetry evening on 26 April. The first one's of the readers taken at The Lighthouse in Deal. It's actually the last regular Soundlines poetry event at the pub and I was honoured to be one of  two special feature poets of the evening.Thank you to Gary and Jeff for inviting me to read. Thanks also to Soundlines and the audience for the warm, relaxed and welcoming atmosphere on the evening. 

Poetry Reading at The Lighthouse, Deal Kent

I've been offered a short poetry reading slot at The Lighthouse pub in Deal, Kent

It's going to happen on Thursday 26 April

It starts at 8.00

50 The Strand, Walmer, Deal, Kent, UK

Entry is free!

Haiga

in the grey

shallows, they wander

a path of light

Photograph by Hugh Griffiths 

www.creativelight.org.uk

Poetry Workshop cornerHouse Community Arts Centre Surbiton

Everyone is welcome

beginners or experienced writers

On:

Saturday 5 May 2018

From:

10.30 am - 12.30 pm

At:

The cornerHouse Community and Arts Centre

116 Douglas Road

Surbiton

Surrey

KT6 7SB

Led by:

David Loffman

The cornerHouse

Poetry Reading, The Troubadour, 5 March, 8.00pm

I'm one of about 50 poets invited to read at the mirror, mirror themed party evening as part of the coffee house poetry programme at The Troubadour.

Venue: The Troubadour

Address: 263-265 Old Brompton Road, SW5

On: Monday 5 March

Starts: 8.00

Admission: £7.00 on the door

Come along and enjoy an evening of poetry, music and prizes!

Poetry Reading The cornerHOUSE Arts and Community Centre Surbiton

Poetry Reading

on the themes Spring, Solitude and Science

On

Friday 16 March 2018

From

8.00 pm

At

The cornerHOUSE Community and Arts Centre

116 Douglas Road

Surbiton

Surrey

KT6 7SB

Admission

£5.00

Wine & Cheese

The cornerHOUSE

Poetry Workshop The CornerHOUSE Community and Arts Centre Surbiton

Free Poetry Workshop

On:

Saturday 17 February 2018

From:

10.30 am - 12.30 pm

At:

The cornerHouse Community and Arts Centre

116 Douglas Road

Surbiton

Surrey

KT6 7SB

Led by:

David Loffman

The cornerHouse

Poetry Reading

I'm reading a poem at The Troubadour this Monday 11 December. I'll be there from 6.00 to drink myself into the reading. The evening starts at 8.00. Come and join us.

The Troubadour

Slow movement

I've been searching for this recording of  the slow movement of Rodrigo's Concierto De Aranjuez. Now suddenly I found it again - probably 40 years after I first heard it. I think it is an extraordinary recording. I first heard it in the late 1970's but somehow I managed to lose track of my vinyl record. I'd moved home several times and then the CD thing happened. 

A few months ago I tried again to search it on YouTube and incredibly I found it. I thought I'd posted it to this blog but I can't find it. So here it is.

Enjoy!!

Andreas Scholl - Vivaldi's Nisi Dominus (Largo)

Just incredible!

Poetry reading tonight

I'm one of several poets reading at the Corner House Arts Centre in Surbiton this evening. It should be fun!

Click here for a link to their website.

If It Be Your Will - Leonard Cohen and The Webb Sisters

I'm writing a poem at the moment and have been drawn to this song / prayer / poem.